I am not sure if this is normal or not, as of lately I have been feeling used and unappreciated. At work, at home, all round. I am not sure why this is. I just got married, I should be happier than a pig in mud.....*don't get me wrong, I am so happy to be married to the man I love*....but I guess just all around in life don't feel appreciated or compensated for the person I am. I tend to put other peoples needs before my own. This may have to do with the fact that I had grown up in a small town. However, in the city people like me get taken advantage of. Or at least this is how I am feeling. I feel I get taken advantage of at home and at work. I think mostly at work, and it trickles down to home. When really the little things I do at home aren't really what's bothering me.... I don't think. I feel like I deserve a raise, however, how do you ask for one and turn around in a week or two to tell your employer that you are leaving at the end of the year. Arg... what to do. Overworked and underpaid..... is this the way life is always going to be?
(Example of differences I find from city to small town: It always amazes me how people forget a simple thing like manners. When you hold a door open for someone don't you deserve a simple 'Thanks'? I would say 2 out of 5 people will thank you if you are so kind to hold a door for them. I think I realize this so much because I work in the heart of downtown. It is a busy place, with a lot of connecting buildings and A LOT of people. There are children that come into our office and instead of saying "can you please turn up the volume of the tv?" they will just yell from across the room "Can you turn up the volume!?" Most times I will say back to them, "Can you please say please and thank-you?". I am not sure how parents feel about this, but I don't like to tolerate rude behaviour. So, this doesn't help with the feeling appreciated aspect of things.)
So, I am wondering, is this because of the wedding being over? (and yes I have been procrastinating thank you cards, soon I promise) Am I feeling lost over the fact that I don't have something huge that I am planning, and requires the majority of my time? Or is it simply because I am lazy and don't have the wedding to blame for my laziness?
Well no matter what the cause is for my sudden case of the blues I am going to nip this thing in the butt before it gets out of hand. I am thinking that I have to take more initiative and get off the couch and fill my night schedule with something for me. Yoga? Good possibility. Going to the gym? Another good idea. Walk the dog nightly? A fantastic idea for both her and me and maybe we can wrangle Cam into the works. I am however, a creature of habit and schedule. So I need to find a way to get in all of my 'must do chores' and the things I want to do.
I apologize for this blog, it was more of a posting for me and my sanity and getting thoughts and feelings out in the open. However, if anyone has any thoughts to my craziness and a possible solution on how to deal with it I am all ears ;o)
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1 comment:
Oh Mrs. McLean, I don't think that you are lazy nor do I think that there is anything wrong.
Planning a wedding as beautiful as yours certainly will make you tired after the fact. The excitement, the reality and the fatigue are likely just catching up to you. It happens to EVERYONE.
As for feeling underappreciated in your employment, I think unfortunately that it is a sign of today's work force. Employers try to save a buck due to expenses and such rising yet the cost of living is higher for the employees. Plus, I think that the pay in general in Alberta, unless you get into oil & gas is poor and lower. It is misleading for many to think that Alberta is the "land of opportunity". I think that there are jobs out there though that people do find and enjoy, but it may be few and far between.
So my dear, try not to be hard on yourself. Just take your time, recover from all of the excitement in your life for the past year, enjoy every moment with Cam and then consider what to do about your job if things don't change for you.
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